Raising a child with special needs requires a lot of responsibility, just like raising any child. You always want the best for them and their safety but there comes a time when kids themselves must begin to perform skills independently. Helping your child too much may result in them relying on you more throughout life. How can you go about this without feeling the need of being overbearing and overprotective? There are multiple ways to approach this and here are some helpful ways to begin…
Providing your child choices instead of deciding for them allows for them to make decisions on their own. It also allows them to make mistakes they can learn from. Practice this by having your child make their own choices. You can limit the options to your criteria, but in the end the child should benefit from freedom of choice. This will also give them a sense of independence and accomplishment. This can be used in any situation, such as choice of wardrobe or to select a meal off a menu.
Resist from helping them out as much as possible and encourage them to try new things on their own. You can also assure them that you are there if they do need your assistance after trying. If they rely on you to simply tie their shoe or open the door, be sure to switch roles with them. Ask your child for help and have them open the door for you. Ask your child to teach you how to do something. This allows them to take control of their actions, reiterate things they’ve already learned and feel independent.
Provide challenges for your child to overcome. Depending on the condition, lay something out for the child to do themselves. Such as asking your child to pick up and object from off the floor and determine where it belongs; or have them maneuver in and out of the house when you are cleaning. This will encourage your child to critically think for themselves.
Set goals and reminders to complete tasks and assignments. A checklist or agenda will allow them to accomplish bigger responsibilities. A picture schedule is also very effective to provide your child with a visual representation of what to expect and a sense of accomplishment when they are finished. When a child is organized, they will have a better understanding of what to expect, a decreased sense of any anxiety and they may not feel the need to come to you in reassurance.
Bottom line, creating new opportunities which allow your child to develop new skills and critical thinking and overall decreasing the amount of assistance you provide them, can be very beneficial to their growth and development in the long run. Encourage your child today with some of these strategies!